Boys Are Welcome at ECS

Boys like danger. Boys like playing cops and robbers, drawing pictures of guns, dinosaurs, and climbing and jumping off things.

In a sensible society, general differences between boys and girls will be recognized (celebrated even) and institutions like schools will act accordingly. But we don’t live in a sensible society.

We’ve seen reports of boys being suspended for drawing pictures of guns, parents reported for allowing boys to have airsoft or NERF guns, and recognition that boys are diagnosed with ADD/ADHD far more often than their female counterparts.

It is no small wonder many parents don’t want to send their boys to public schools. Our society in general, and public schools in particular, are hostile to normal boyhood. It seems in all of our “safe spaces” boys are told they are toxic.

Emmanuel Christian School is different, and purposefully so. 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 (HCSB) says “Be alert, stand firm in the faith, act like a man, be strong. Your every action must be done with love.” Notice those phrases connected to standing firm in the faith, “act like a man, be strong.” We believe God created manhood, and what God created is good. And the path to manhood runs through boyhood.

As a school, our aim is to partner with parents to help their boys become men and girls become ladies. We cannot do that if we actively stamp out of boys all of the qualities necessary for them to become men (more on ladies in a future post, it’s best to hit one topic at a time).

What does this look like practically? Well, we are far from perfect, but we are getting better at it. Here are some things we recognize to cultivate healthy boyhood in a way that gives rise to manhood:

1. Play is not a threat, and rough play is not a pathology. Yes, for insurance reasons we cannot let the boys climb ALL the things they want to climb. But we have a healthy recognition that boys are wired in a way that gravitates toward doing what is physically challenging. This can be channeled into sports, acts of valor, hikes and outdoor activities, etc.

2. Boyhood is NOT ADD/ADHD. Those are real issues. But boys are being over-diagnosed merely because boyhood is not compatible with sitting still for 8+ hours a day. “This kid just can’t sit still.” Oh, well have you tried letting him run around?

3. Boys must have purpose. Girls need purpose too, obviously. But the things boys and girls associate with purpose tend to be very different. Boys like to protect and provide, and so naturally see knights, Vikings, and swashbucklers like the Three Musketeers as positive role models. When all is said and done, we want boys to see that Jesus is the ultimate man.

4. No clean fingernails allowed. In a building our size, things go wrong and need repaired. As much as possible, I like to grab a student or two and have them help. The best way to teach responsibility is to give boys something for which they are responsible. Most recently a student helped me repair a broken light switch. While not all repairs literally get you dirty, the principle remains.

5. Only real accomplishments can compete with screens. Addiction to smart phones is real. But most boys get roped in because that’s the one place they can continue to feel like they are accomplishing something. Achieving something in a video game activates the same reward centers in the brain as achieving something in real life. If we want to push back against the screens, we have to give boys opportunities for real accomplishments.

Boys are welcome at Emmanuel Christian School. God created man, and to fight against God’s design for manhood is harmful to society and devastating to boys. May God give us the grace to push back against the tides of our time.

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Girls are Girls at ECS

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Math is Not Racist